Who Knew Cankles Were So Popular?

When I first switched from blogger to wordpress back in April, THIS was the very first post I wrote on wordpress.

Now, 5 months later….here are the views on this blog just TODAY, all because of people who are totally infatuated with cankles.  How funny….

Is It Sarah or Tina?

One was born on May 18, 1970 with the given middle name Samatina.  The other was born on February 11, 1964 with the given middle name Louise.  Which is A and which is B?

One has a 17 year old daughter who’s 5 months pregnant.  The other portrayed an infertile mother and hired a baby mama to have a child for her.  Which is A and which is B?

One was born in Upper Darby, Pennsylvania and graduated from the Universita of Virginia.  The other was born in Sandpoint, Idaho and attended Hawaii Pacific College before transferring and graduating from the University of Idaho.  Which is A and which is B?

One hosted a weekend news show entitled “Weekend Update”.  The other majored in communications-journalism and worked briefly as a sports reporter.  Which A and which is B?

One is kind of attractive in a cute sort of way.  The other is sort of cute in an attractive kind of way.  Which is A and which is B?

One is both the youngest and the first woman governor in her state’s history.  The other was the first female head writer in the history of a major comedy show.  Which is A and which is B?

One was recently announced as the “sexiest woman in the world” by readers of the lesbian/bisexual website AfterEllen.com….consequently, she is happily married to a man and is not a lesbian.  The other has sons named Track and Trig….consequently, neither enjoy running track or calculating trigonometry.  Which is A and which is B?

Who wants some a this, huh? Who wants some?

Smart Fix 40

Smart Fix 40?  Now there’s an oxymoron, a paradox, a minimalization, and a misnomer all rolled into one. 

Here are some more appropriate names:  “We Keep Fixing 40″, “We Never Built 40 The Right Way To Begin With”, “Eternally Detouring Around 40″, “Making You Late to Work for 40 Years”, “40 Ways to Repair a Highway in One Decade”, “Build Roads, Not Schools”, “Can 40 Really Be Fixed”, or “The, Hey, Out of Town Passerby-er, Do You Happen to Keep Excedrin in Your Glovebox Because You’re About to Try to Drive Through Knoxville and You’re Never Going to Want to See Us Again, Smart Fix 40 Project.” 

I have an idea.  How about “Let’s Build 400 Miles of Bike Paths So People Can Exercise, Be Environmentally Friendly, and Save Gas Money at the Same Time Without Worrying About Being Mauled by a Hummer”.  Is anyone lobbying for that project during the governmental budget meetings? 

Cankles & The Atomic Leg Drop

Steve asks, “Life Recaptured (LR), I hear a lot of references to Hillary Clinton’s cankles?  Can you explain what cankles are and why it’s apparently a big deal to people?”

Great question Steve.  Cankles refers to the unsightly melding of the “calves” and “ankles”.  In Hillary’s case, her calves and ankles are both humongous, and sort of look like one continuous tree trunk.  See the picture?  Pretty scary. 

It’s funny because she’s a woman.  She’s classy.  She’s extremely smart.  She’s running for president.  And her calves are roughly the size of Hulk Hogan’s, circa 1986.  And remember, the Hulkster used to finish off his opponents with the atomic leg drop, using his massives calf and thigh to literally rend them unconscious upon his descent. 

In terms of their relevance to her possible presidency, it is nice to know that, if smack comes to smack, Hillary has the physical tools necessary to personally crush any wartime opponent. 

Your Friend…LR

what’s your voting criteria?

This picture was taken at a Batesville, Mississippi muffler shop:

So, what criteria do you use in determining who you vote for?

a few more random tidbits…

My Mamaw Edelen was born on leap year day. Today is her birthday. She’s turning 20. How cool is that?

My fingers and my wrist are really sore from practicing guitar again over the last couple of weeks. But it feels better than my eyes hurting from doing nothing but watching tv every night.

So, it looks like our choices in November 2008 are going to be an inexperienced Senator whose middle name is Hussein, who never shows up to vote on bills, and whose campaign is based primarily on rockin-the-hizzouse ….vs…. a guy in his 70’s who has the cordial personality of an angry donkey, has almost spooky transparent skin, is anxious to exercise even more miliary strength, and who, frankly, wasn’t even a good enough candidate to beat out George Bush in 2000. Bummer.

I’m currently infatuated with the Toyota Yaris.

I’m beginning to realize that, as I move forward in this vegetarian venture, that I need to bid a sad farewell to fast food. In general, here’s what is offered at fast food places that I will actually be able to eat: baked potatos, french fries, apple pies, yogurt, bean burritos, ice cream, plain biscuits, and not much else. This is going to be tough. But I’ll be better off for it.

Has anyone noticed that the NBA is back in full force? Remember 6 years ago when you sort of forgot it existed, and any mention of it made you cringe?

During the UT – Vanderbilt game, Bruce Pearl was so angry at one point he actually turned green. No kidding. Me and a few friends were watching the game at Spicy’s and thought he might actually tear his clothes off and morph into the Incredible Hulk.

It’s lunch time, so I gotta go. Today’s menu – Ramen noodles. Hmmm, good.