A few days ago, I wrote that I was getting very tired of intolerance.

Another example.  Just this weekend, during a gathering of several families at a local Knoxville park on the river, someone’s 3 year old boy wandered off and ended up drowning in the river.  He was found by rescue divers about 2 hours after the parents noticed he was missing.

Terrible.  Tragic.  I think that’s the 3rd or 4th toddler aged child that has died in Knoxville in the past few months from drowning or other tragic means.  It breaks my heart to read about these things.

On the local newsstation website, the moderator ended up having to delete many comments from viewers that basically trashed the parents for not watching their child more closely.  Angrily blaming them for the death.

One commenter asked God in heaven to please welcome his new angel and look over his family.  A nice sentiment, right.

Another commenter, in response, writes, “Sorry, but a human can not ever become an angel. Saved perhaps, a saint once in a while, but never an angel. Angels are a totally different type of creature that were invented separately and before man.”

WHO CARES!  ARE YOU SERIOUS!  These types of things exemplify the intolerance that has just angered me recently.  A child dies, hundreds of people are in shock and terrible mourning, and many of our local residents respond by trashing the parents and taking a moment to remind us that the lost child is actually not an angel.

I’m over it.

Intolerance.  Especially intolerance among Christians.  On my I-Google homepage, I have links to local news articles from a Knoxville area TV station.  I often cringe when reading the public comments in response to certain articles.  It’s like area Christians are using the comments forum as their own hell-fire-brimstone platforms, and it’s sickening.

I’m not thrilled to have gone through some things I’ve gone through in my life.  But some of my experiences have taught me that people are truly flawed.  All people.  ALL people.  Some hide it better than others.  Some resist better than others.  Some just don’t give a damn.  But, ultimately, we are all damaged goods who need the love of a Savior more than we could ever imagine.  And we need it every second of every day, because for some of us, that’s about how often we sin.  Instead, many in our world mistake intolerance for tough love, taking pride in the fact that they might sin just a little less than the next guy.

We’ve got to walk through life with a perspective – a world view if you prefer – that allows us to see ourselves for who/where/what we truly are.  A miniscule fish in an infinitely large ocean, who somehow is still known and loved and pursued by the God who created both the fish and the ocean.  Our lives are important, but no more important or meaningful than the lives of our neighbors.  All sin.  All do wrong.  All will continue to do wrong.  Jesus helped make our goal in life so easy for us – Love God, and love others.  Can it be that simple, yet be so difficult?  Apparently so.

Greedy Monsters.  I’m reading John Steinbeck’s “The Grapes of Wrath” for the first time since high school.  (I miss the half pint milk cartons)  Early in the book, there’s an amazing dialogue between the owner’s of the land, and the tenants (squatters) who work the land.  Basically, the owner’s need the squatters to move, because they’re not profitable and are behind on their loans.  The owner’s, in order to deflect their guilt and ignore their sympathies, place all the blame on these actions on the monster…the bank.

“You see, a bank or a company can’t do that (just eat off the land), because those creatures don’t breathe air, don’t eat side-meat.  They breathe profits; they eat the interest on money.  If they don’t get it, they die the way you die without air, without side-meat.  It is a sad thing, but it is so.  It is just so……….The bank, the monster, has to have profits all the time.  It can’t wait.  It’ll die.  No, taxes go on.  When the monster stops growing, it dies.  It can’t stay one size.”

Later, the owner says, “We’re sorry.  It’s not us.  It’s the monster.  The bank isn’t like a man.”

The squatter/tenant replies, “Yes, but the bank is only made of men”

“No, you’re wrong there – quite wrong there.  The bank is something else than men.  It happens that every man in a bank hates what the bank does, and yet the bank does it.  The bank is something more than men, I tell you.  It’s the monster.  Men made it, but they can’t control it.”

This was written over 65 years ago, but is still so true.  Men made the monster, but they can’t control it.  I’m tired of the monster of government, of big business, of if-you’re-not-growing-you’re-dying economics.  It’s crap.  I’m tired of paying the monster, depending on the monster, and even (to some extent) working for the monster.  This business attitude has destroyed much of our national camaraderie, the notion that we’re all striving for a better life.  Too many people now feel like there are simply the rich people, and the poor people, and that’s just the way it’s gonna be, brother.  And the gap continues to broaden, to divide.  What’s so bad about a business taking care of the needs of its community, making a reasonable profit so that those who own it and work it can make a good living, and that being the extent of it?  Does it always have to grow, make more money, and conquer the competition?  Can’t it just provide a service to people and take pride in doing so?

Building Things.  I’m a terrible builder.  If you asked me to build a birdhouse, I wouldn’t know where to begin.  My understanding of what goes into building  a house…foundation, framing, drywall, etc…is basically nill.

Fixing Things.  Similar, but different.  Fortunately, I’m not of the Heathcliff Huxtable ilk … he wanted to fix things even though he couldn’t … I just recognize I can’t … so I don’t.  The extent of my handman skills are in the realm of adding windshield wiper fluid to my car, hanging pictures in the living room, and changing out the air filters each month.

Tolerance.  I hate this about myself.  Sometimes I realize my intolerance and stop it…most of the time I’m blinded by it.  I seem to hold others to unreal expectations of how they should act, feel, speak, live…even to expectation I don’t measure up to myself.  I’m intolerant of people who are dependent on others to do things I think they should do for themselves.  I’m not even really sure where this comes from, but it’s definitely a sour side of my personality that I’m working on.

Cursing.  I don’t consider myself foul mouthed by any means, but I tend to use more curse words in daily life than I’d like to.  It was definitely worse back in my car-selling days….working around drunks, druggies, and curse-every-other-word-because-they-can’t-think-of-better-things-to-say people definitely rubbed off on me a little.  And I’m definitely not a cursing-is-of-the-devil kind of guys…I just don’t like when it’s used as a crutch, as a remedy for the absense of better vocabulary.

Gift Giving.  I’ve shared this before.  Something inside of me just has this sort of disdain for gift giving holidays….Valentine’s, Easter, Birthdays, Anniversary’s, Christmas….it’s not the spirit of the holiday I’m opposed to, but the cultural expectation of gift giving – gift giving as an expression of how much you love or care about a spouse, friend, family member, coworker, etc.  It’s the way you’re looked down upon if you don’t pitch in at the $10.00 office gift swap.  It’s the idea that a holiday somehow isn’t complete unless you buy someone something.  I don’t necessarily apologize for my stance on this….what I’m bad at is letting it affect me to a point where I’m unable to fully enjoy the spirit of the holiday because of my poor frame of mind over gift giving.

Exercising.  Plain and simple…I almost never, ever exercise.

Praying Before Meals.  Plain and simple…I almost never, ever pray before meals.

Team Sports.  This is a combination of my inclination to be reclusive….as well as my intolerance (see above) for the miscomings of others.  I’ve had a pretty terrible competitive drive for most my sporting life.  In college, I would get so mad at my intramural teammates (who, by the way, were my closest friends, but simply were not quite as athletic as I was), that I finally gave up intramurals after my sophomore year, because I could see how damaging this was to my psyche and potentially to my friendships.  Because of this, individual sports/games – tennis, golf, ping pong, billiards, darts, stuff like that – have been more enjoyable for me over the years.  At least in those sports, if I lose, it’s because I was not good enough, and I have no one else to blame.

Small Talk.  I’m definitely not one to talk about the weather.  The weather is the weather.  It happens everyday, all year.  It changes.  It’s hot, cold, rainy, snowy.  The weather is the weather.  I tend to go straight from small talk to meaningful talk as quickly as possible if I can.  The bad part is that, just as often, I tend to go from small talk to I-don’t-want-to-talk-to-you-at-all if meaningful talk doesn’t seem possible or interesting.

I’m having trouble understanding economics, bailouts, and the American way of life.  Actually, struggling might be a better way of putting.  I’m struggling with these concepts.  I’ve already written my thoughts on the auto bailout (against).  And I enjoyed getting our extra tax refund last year as much as anybody.  But I’m still struggling.

It seems as though Washington is hell bent on keeping The American Way of Life in tact.  I get this feeling that, unless Americans are relatively wealthy, able to freely spend money, and can all afford to buy homes that are bigger than they need, then somehow, as a nation, we are not fulfilling our historical destiny.  This ideal is starting to make me sick. 

Just 30-40 years ago, people HAD to live within their means.  Credit was an almost foreign concept.  20% down payments on cars or homes were the norm.  Buying only what you needed at the grocery to eat for that week was typical.  A 2000 square foot home was huge. 

Part of my struggle is that I’m envious of those who have money, and have little to worry about financially.  I have a nauseous desire sometimes to drive a bigger vehicle, to take great vacations twice a year, to eat out more frequently at places classier than Cracker Barrel, to see a $150.00 pair of sunglasses in the mall that would frame my mug perfectly, and just be able to get them.  These desires are also making me sick.  When I look at them in the right frame of mind, they even bring me to appreciate what I have and don’t have.  It helps to understand that there’s a reason I drive the cheapeast car Hyundai makes, a reason we still rent a small townhouse, a reason we’ve taken 1 real vacation in the last 5 years.  The main reason is because that’s what we can afford.  I made mistakes.  We made mistakes.  I struggled financially for a few years and built up a mound of credit card debt that we’re still chipping away at.  And as much as I’d like someone to come along and bail me out, I appreciate the lesson I’m learning in the struggle.

I just wish our country could appreciate the struggle a little more.  To understand that a capitalist market should not allow for bailouts.  To know that the sense of entitlement is becoming a curse.  To see The American Way of Life through lenses other than wealth and power.  And to realize the need for a change in the curve of our culture.

(in no particular order, fashion, or importance)…

I’m generally not a fan of Christmas cards.  When I was in college, most students were big into doing Christmas cards for all the other students they were friends with.  One day, after getting about 30 cards in my mail box, all with a generic “Merry Christmas, From (Name)” inside, I made a decision.  No longer would I send out Christmas cards – or any other cards for that matter – if I couldn’t take time to make them important, meaningful, and/or at least write a personalized note to the person receiving it.  I’ve pretty much stuck to that.  Last year I created a little “Edelen Family 2007″ booklet with pictures and year in review updates of our family, and sent those out at Christmas.  This year, we’ve sent out no cards at all.  Just know this…if you send us a card, and all it says inside is “Love the Jones Family” or “From the Martin’s” or “Merry Christmas…The Smith’s”, that card is appreciated, but it gets thrown away immediately.  Bah, humbug.

I remember one Christmas getting several Nintendo games from Santa.  Being the oldest of four, Santa came to our house for a LONG time.  In fact, since I’m 15 years older than my youngest sibling, Santa still came to our home when I was in college!  Anyways, this one Christmas I got up at approximately 4:30am to go see what was in the living room.  One of the Nintendo games was called “1946″.  It was based on an old World War II bomber plane, and you flew the plane and shot things and completed missions.  By the time my parents got up around 7:30am, I had already beaten the game. 

One Christmas I got a Honda CR-50R dirt bike.  Dirt bikes were the craze in my area, all my friends were getting them.  Problem is, when you break your arm 3 different times in a 2 year span (from 4th – 6th grade), it tends to make you scared of ever being injured again.  I loved that dirt bike….all 6 months and maybe 8 times that I rode it.  I just didn’t have the backbone for it.  And I always felt bad because I remember how much time my dad spent with me looking for the perfect dirt bike.  Sorry dad.  I hope the hammer I’m getting you this year makes up for it.

I LOVE the Christmas spirit.  I’m just not crazy about the way it’s fleshed out.  Credit cards, malls, re-gifting,  overloaded dumpsters filled with wrapping paper, SALES, SALES, SALES, eating tons of food and more dessert than you should have in a year, and feeling guilty when I don’t particpate in the $5.00 gift exchanges at work.  The regular gift exchange, the redneck gift exchange, the white elephant gift exchange.  Before you know it, you’ve spent a car payment or two just so you don’t feel weird being the person who doesn’t buy into buying gifts.  Bah.

I’ve lived in Tennessee for 10 1/2 years.  In that time, there have been approximately 6 occasions where it has snowed enough to either sled on, make snow angels, or honestly keep you from going to work.  Therefore, the odds of a White Christmas in Knoxville compute to 1750:1.  But I’m still dreaming.

Has there ever been a better holiday tv special than Rudolph the Rednosed Reindeer?  It first aired in 1964, and has been telecast every year since.  I’ve watched it every year for as long as I can remember, and always look forward to it again and again.  I have noticed though, as I’ve gotten older, that the Abominable Snowman seemed a LOT scarier when I was younger than he does now.  (Wikipedia just taught me that Rudolph, A Charlie Brown Christmas, Frosty the Snowman, and The Grinch were ALL first aired in the 1960’s.  Amazing.)

Drank egg-nog about 2 weeks ago.  I’m not sure if I’d ever had it before.  It was delicious.

We’re heading to Kentucky on Friday and will stay until Tuesday.  This will be our longest trip to Kentucky to see my family since Eli was born.

I have mixed opinions about using X-Mas as an abbreviation for Christmas.  I do it sometimes, I just sometimes feel weird about it, even though I’m fully aware that X is an abbreviation for the Greek word for Christ.  If anyone ever says it’s wrong to use X-Mas because “You’re taking Christ out of Christmas”, just tell them that God despises lying and being judgemental.  Oh yeah, and Merry Christmas.

The BCS.  It’s dumb.  It’s even worse than high-school superlatives voting.  I was voted “Most Studious” my senior year, basically because I was always known as the smartest guy at school.  But I definitely didn’t study the most.  I can tell you at least 4-5 guys who worked harder than me.  But because I got good grades, I must be the most studious.  And how subjective is “most popular” or “most attractive”?  And so it goes with the BCS.  Oklahoma beat Texas Tech who beat Texas who beat Oklahoma.  So who’s better?  Florida.  That’s who.

The Socio-Economic Climate.  I can only speak from personal perspective on this one.  I’m semi-anti-social, but not to the point that I can’t speak and carry on conversations with people.  I just prefer smaller groups to larger groups when it comes to relational stuff.  I can pretty much get to know anyone 1 on 1, but I quiet down a lot in a group setting.  Economically, I’m probably “lower middle class”.  I’m not even sure there’s a true middle class now.  It skips right from lower middle class to upper middle class.  As far as the climate, it was 22 degrees out this morning, and my car was encrusted with ice.  It took me 10 minutes just to de-ice all the windows and windshield, then put deicer fluid in both mine and Erin’s car, which ended up making me late to work. 

ESPN Writer Bill Simmons.  This guys is an amazing columnist and writer.  But his articles are always so long, I just don’t have time to finish them.  Which is very frustrating.  Like getting into a GREAT book and realizing it’s 2:00am, you’re too sleepy to continue, but there’s only 5 chapters left to finish the book.  Ahhh, what a dilemma, right!  That happened to me with The DaVinci Code, I ended up finishing it at about 4:00am and had to get up at 6:45am for work. 

Live Theater Productions.  In the last 15 years or so, the only live theater style show I’ve seen is Riverdance, about 5 years ago, here in Knoxville.  In middle/high school, we used to take field trips to Louisville, KY to see live shows at a place called Actor’s Theater, which probably seated about 600 people total.  The most memorable for me was The Cask of Amontillado.  I always enjoyed those shows.  But for some reason, I just can’t muster enough desire to go see shows today.  Partly because I just am clueless about what’s in town and available to see.  And partly because I’m simply unwilling to shell out $30 – $50 to see the good ones at the Tennessee Theater.  Any free theater productions around town that I don’t know about?

Meatloaf.  Friends, I absolutely love meatloaf.  It’s incredible.  Crackel Barrel’s meatloaf is usually really really good.  Erin has never been that big a fan, but recently a co-worker shared her meatloaf recipe with us.  Erin tried it.  We ALL loved it, even Eli.  It has something to do with Heinz 57 sauce and brown sugar in the recipe that puts it over the top.  Meatloaf is fairly simple to make, you can make a lot of it rather inexpensively, it goes well with a variety of side dishes, it reheats magnificently, and it’s very filling.  If I were stranded in the desert for 40 years, it’s very possible that I would pray for meatloaf to fall from the heavens.

Wow, I didn’t realize life could be this great.  Gas prices continue to drop, the holidays are upon us, Crossings is only 7 weeks away from our first service at 4MS…and the Turn or Burn truck is back…except this time, it’s BIGGER, BADDER, and MEANER than ever!!!

Remember the first Turn or Burn Truck?  If not, take a minute to check it out.

It’s been a few months since the Turn or Burn truck has been seen.  Then, about a week or so ago, my friend John told me he actually saw a Turn or Burn JEEP in Knoxville.  Yes, a Jeep Wrangler.  Weird.  Wouldn’t you know it, less than a week later, I’m on my way to work on Monday morning, and I see this on the corner of Lovell Road and Lexington Drive.

You can clearly see…it’s different.  Bigger.  Meaner.  It has evolved from a 16ft to a 24ft truck.  Now, granted, the other side of the truck is blank.  Just a yellow truck.  Maybe their faith promise holy fire yest ye answer to the flames offering didn’t meet expectations.  Who knows.  But this is a monster.  Physically and spirtually.  So, for your viewing pleasure, I took close up pictures of the left, middle, and right side of the truck, so you can more clearly see the details.  You’ll be able to see where one section ends and the other begins.  Look at the gentle wording.  The calming imagery.  Let the message soak in.  And then tell me how you feel.  Here goes:

No introduction here.  Just a statement.  THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT SHOULD NOT BAIL OUT THE AUTO INDUSTRY.  When you look at the facts and figures, it’s simply obvious. 

Ever wonder what an average auto worker in an American made car factory makes?  And I’m not talking about the suit and tie guys…I’m talking about the ones standing on the line, bolting on the door or putting on a wheel?  The average base pay STARTS at about $25 – $28 per hour, and ranges up to around $40 – $50 per hour based on your job and tenure.  This is a STARTING salary of $52,000 to $58,000 per year.  Now, when you include health care benefits, pension benefits, retirement benefits, etc…those pay rates actually increase to around $65.00 – $75.00 an hour per worker.  But, let’s just focus now on the actual paycheck.  This means that someone with no college education (not a given, but likely), performing a job in an automated production line, earns more per year than most teachers, social workers, many nurses, and a slew of other professional workers who earned college educations in their field of work. 

And this is to pay people to build the cars that are consistently the lowest rated and most overvalued cars in our market.  The average pay per worker for Toyota and Honda in their American factories is closer to $45-$50 per worker (vs $65 – $75 for the Big 3), yet they produce a higher quality vehicle with a greater overall value and lower cost to own.  And this is not based just on perception.  The perception over time has been conceived and grown based on facts.  Look at any April edition of Consumer Reports over the last decade.  Read Motor Trend, Car and Driver, Automobile.  Look at their Top 10 lists, their best used car value lists, the winners of most of their vehicle comparison tests.  It’s not exclusively foreign, but it’s certainly mostly foreign cars that dominate these ratings and lists. 

Therefore, why would we simply “bail out” the Big 3?  If a middle-class school system consistently got low national scores, had a terrible graduation rate, and was always way over budget, would the state simply give them more money to make it all better?  No, they’d be expected to restructure, make new hires, reorganize their curriculum, have better oversight, and so forth.  If a hospital had terrible ethics complaints, lost millions of dollars each year, had the highest death rate in it’s region, and was not up to sanity codes….bail out?  Nope.  If a restaurant chain made poor food, overpaid it’s workers, provided slow service, and was generally unclean…bail out?  Absolutely not. 

Then, of course, these businesses (and most businesses) are not governed and choke-holded by decades old, out of date, money grubbing Unions who care nothing for the health of the business, but only for the bottom line pay of it’s members.  I don’t understand it.  If GM came out right now and completely broke it’s Union contract and told them to go to hell….do they really think they’d simply lose all their workers and not be able to produce vehicles anymore?  Would there not be a mile-long line of people ready to come in and get paid $20.00 an hour for a job that a union guy made $35.00 an hour doing?  Come on!!  I thought we lived in a free-market society?  If GM went under, and 4,000,000 GM cars per year were all of a sudden not being sent to dealers across the country….people would buy other brands instead, and those brands sales would increase, which would demand an increase in productions from their factories, which would require more workers, and possibly more facilities.  I know that oversimplified and I’m no economics expert, but there’s gotta be a better answer than a bail out. 

Because personally, if part of my tax dollar is being given to help secure jobs for $60,000 a year auto line workers, I’m going to be pretty ticked off.

If you’ve been reading this blog for more than a few weeks, you’re aware of just how much I LOVE door-to-door evangelists, bicycle riding evangelists, street preachers, gospel tracts, and so forth.  

Two weeks ago, before seeing the movie “Eagle Eye” with Erin at the Pinnacle theater in Turkey Creek, yours truly needed to use the restroom.  This is what I found on top of the toilet paper dispenser inside the stall.  Made for good bathroom reading. 

Just in case you can’t read it clearly….basically, it reminds you that there’s nothing more you need to do in order to go to hell.  It’s already a given that you’re on your way there….unless, of course, you believe upon Jesus and take a moment to pray something like….okay, okay.  I’m calm.  I know we all need Jesus.  I know that without Him I’m definitely on a one way ticket to hell.  But can you imagine one day being at church, camp, or a conference, and hearing a stirring testimony from a guest speaker, and it starts with, “I was a sinner.  I was on my way to hell.  Until one weekend I went to see Nights in Rodanthe with my wife.  And before the movie, I realized I needed to go number 2.  While doing my duty, I noticed a gospel tract on the toilet paper dispenser and thought, ‘what the hell, I’ve got a couple of minutes’.  And ‘what the hell’ was right, because I realized then and there that brimstone was in my future.  Then I prayed a prayer, left the restroom, and decided immediately with my wife that we would exchange our tickets and go see Fireproof instead.”

I took Eli to Dollywood yesterday after church.  We hadn’t been since May (even though we have season passes), and it was the perfect day to go.  75 degrees, low attendance, and we rode 10 rides in less than 2 hours.  Right now Dollywood is celebrating “Barbeque and Bluegrass” season.  At one point, we walked by a food area that, literally, had an entire pig speared and roasting over flaming coals.  Now THAT is exactly the kind of thing you’d expect to see at a family park.

I used to be a golfing freak.  Several years back, I even considered entering PGA of America training to become a full time golf instructor.  Now, I’ve not swung a club or struck a ball in 16 months.  But also, just recently, I’ve actually started to lose interest in watching golf.  Basically, if Tiger’s not in the field and near the lead, I pretty much don’t care about watching.  This weekend was the Ryder Cup, and I probably watched about 90 minutes of the entire event.  Not long ago I would have taped the entire Saturday and Sunday coverage and stayed up until 2:00am watching every shot.  Good bye golf.

Jason’s Deli is now our new favorite place to eat…that is, when we actually have money to eat out…which is rare.  It’s quite a bit like McAlister’s Deli, except a little more “modern” and “youthful” feeling, which is important as you near your mid-30’s.  And they have free ice cream with any meal purchase.  Mmmm.

Speaking of nearing your mid-30’s.  Played tennis last night….and this morning my knees hurt, my thighs hurt, my back hurts, and I’m morbidly tired.  I apologize to my employer in advance for my lack of productivity today.  Where did 1996 go, and can I get back there soon?

A few thoughts about taking the Lord’s name in vain.  If I were to witness something terrible being done, and I said “God, Damn It”, in the sense that I’m literally saying “God….damn that terrible thing”, is that a violation of the commandment?  Or even just “damn it” in general…who’s the only One who can actually “damn” a thing?  God?  So would even just saying “damn it” imply that your asking God to do something?  Also…it’s interesting how Christians can be so cautious to never say the actual phrase “God Da** It”, but we so easily can say things like, “God, I’m so tired” or “Oh my God, you’re kidding me”.  But, ultimately, aren’t those types of phrases, unless we’re truly speaking to God in that moment, still taking the Lord’s name in vain? 

In honor of my friend, this week I’ll be purchasing a small Butterball turkey, putting it in a Crockpot with a can of cranberry sauce and a package of onion soup mix, and letting it cook all day on low.  I’m told it ends up making just about the most scrumptious turkey you could imagine.  We shall see.

(edit – addition) Oh yeah, me and Eli went to the Oakes Farm on Saturday to take a hay ride and check out the kids stuff.  It’s awesome, they have a bounce house, a gigantic sand pit, a big play box filled with kerneled corn that kids can jump around in, a kids maze, and more….while we were there, a 40 (or so) year old guy and his wife who are from Maine and are studying at Temple Baptist / Crown College in north Knoxville gave me a Gospel tract so I could get to know Jesus as my Savior.  Come on, man, who in the world gives away Gospel tracts while at a family-friendly corn maze/hayride/other fun stuff farm?  And who still thinks that initiating ridiculously awkard small-talk for the sole purpose of being able to give someone a gospel tract is really an effective way of introducing people to Jesus?  Oh, I know….Temple Baptist and Crown College “evangelizers”, that’s who.